Truth

The hardest words to hear are the words that are the truth. Like finding out that the reason your relationship failed was because of you. Like hearing the words, " I just stopped loving you!" Those words are hard to hear especially when you had hope that maybe love was still there.  Then you start to want to hate that person that is causing you to feel like you failed. However, the truth is you don't hate them you are just in pain. You want them to feel what you feel so you tell them whatever you can to make them feel like you do, empty and small. I guess what I am learning from my journey of being heart broken is that it is okay to feel pain. It is okay to hear the truth and that God is with me. God is with me as I cry myself to sleep at night wondering when and where I messed up. God is with me as I fall on my knees, crying and asking him to please help me forgive her and forgive me.  I know that God's promise to me will come true.  Yet, I am struggling and I am in so much pain because I'm having a hard time with my reality. I am having a hard time accepting the truth. The truth is that it is over, that God wants me to love me now. I guess my message today is do not delay Gods truth. Listen carefully do not be fooled by what you want. Love sometimes just isn't enough and you need to know when to give up. So today, I gave up and am putting myself in God's hands praying that he helps me through this hard and dark moment in my life.